Your first Irish music session: what to expect and how to join in

A session is people playing tunes they share

Usually it's in a pub, sometimes a back room or someone's kitchen. Nobody has rehearsed and there's no setlist. Someone starts a tune, whoever knows it joins in, and two or three tunes later the set ends and the chat starts again.

Most of the music is dance tunes: jigs, reels, hornpipes, polkas. Some sessions take songs between sets and some never do. A session being in a public pub doesn't mean anyone with an instrument is invited to play. Every session has its own habits, and you learn them by turning up and watching.

Before you go

Message the organiser or the venue. Ask whether newcomers can sit in, when the music actually starts (often later than the listing says), whether there's a slow or learner night, and whether they have a list of tunes they play a lot. Listings go stale, so check it's still running before you travel.

Bring your instrument and a tuner. You don't need twenty tunes to go and listen. If you want to play, I'd rather you knew two of that session's regulars properly than the first half of twenty tunes off a list on the internet.

Arrive, listen and ask

Say hello between sets, never during one. Something like: "I'm learning and this is my first time here. Is it all right to sit in, or should I just listen tonight?" Let them show you where to sit, and don't drag a chair into the circle in the middle of a set.

Then listen for a few sets. Watch who starts the tunes, how loud everyone plays, whether the accompanists take turns, and how they signal the change into the next tune. An evening of watching tells you more about that session than any list of etiquette rules, this one included.

Joining in and sitting out

Play a tune only if you know it and can hold the pulse. Play quieter than you think you need to: if you can't hear the people next to you, you're too loud. When you get lost, stop, listen for a phrase you know and come back in there. Nobody minds a gap. Everybody notices someone guessing.

Don't start a set until someone invites you or there's an obvious lull. When you do, pick a speed you can hold to the end, and ask someone to start it with you if that helps.

I bring two instruments. When I want to lead a tune I play low whistle, and when I'm happy to sit back I play rhythm on guitar. If you play accompaniment, check what's already going before you join in. One guitar suits most sessions, and two players fighting over chords sound bad. If there's already a guitar, bouzouki or bodhrán, ask how they share it, or play the melody on something else.

Recording, phones and coming back

Ask before you record, and ask again if you want to share it anywhere. A recording made with permission is great for learning tunes later, but keep the phone off the table and away from pints, cases and bows. The people in front of you come first.

Before you leave, get the names of one or two tunes you liked. Learn those before the next week and you'll follow far more of the night. A list of ten tunes to learn tends to turn into none.

My first-night checklist

• Check the start time and that newcomers are welcome.
• Tune up before you sit in the circle.
• Listen before you play, and sit out tunes you don't know.
• Ask before starting a set or recording.
• Leave with two tune names and a reason to come back.

Don't try to hide that you're new. A friendly question between sets gets you further than pretending.

Keep learning

Pick your next tunes from my 20 tunes for your first session, then look at the sets players save together. Every session plays its own versions, so check with the people you play with.